A tired evening. Lousy attitude. Relaxed and bent over for some real hot and good tea. Behind the nets, it was me at my terrible best.
Wait, I am coming.
She is an Iron Lady. I have never seen her blink an eye or being moist in a situation. She took tuition classes, her husband has a decent job and her son was studying in a boarding school in a different town. A family of 3 with dreams of their own, I knew them as a courageous and friendly family.
But destiny had other plans. A plan that shattered their lives and bought them to knees. But I just had one question. Why?
One midnight, the phone rings aloud. The call is from her son’s Boarding school. They inform that her son collapsed in his room last night and they did not have a clue till one of his room mates tried to get in to the room. With a heavy and scary tone, they inform her that he is dead.
Her world has just gone down. The couple rush to the boarding school and get his body back home. Doctors inform that he died due to a respiratory problem leading to cardiac arrest.
I met her a few weeks after her son’s death. She was her usual self, didn’t talk much and I did not have the tenacity to stay longer. But I could see the pain she locked herself in.
Not willing to remain inside and refuses to come outside. I could see how her world has collapsed with a blink of an eye.
But disasters have this uncanny knack of knocking doors twice. Again, I was living with the same question. Why?
I visited her a few months later and during the normal conversation, ended up enquiring about her husband. Her response startled me. He has been diagnosed with cancer and is under treatment for the last 3 months. Her voice, not for a minute, had a touch of fear or apprehension about the situation she is dangling with.
I was out of town for 4 months. When I was back, I learnt from her that he passed away last month.
Her life stood toppled and devastated. Yet, she stood firm and I did not see tears in her eyes. She continued with her tuition classes. She started visiting a nearby orphanage and offered her services. Few months down the line, she quit classes and became a regular in the orphanage.
I have since moved out of the city since 7 years. Last time I visited her place, door was locked and neighbours have not seen her around for sometime. As of today, I don’t know where she lives or has moved to.
I, at times, remain astounded by the ways of life. We are not perfect. We make mistakes. We have sinned. Yet, life bestows numerous opportunities to redeem ourselves. And, we survive. We live to see glory.
But in the adversity of time, life decided to show off it’s gruesome face to this lady and her family.
I am still living with the same question. Why?
*Inspired by real life events.
Time is a dis-component of our lives. It’s a sadist and an optimist. It’s charismatic and mundane. Its electric and submissive. But whatever it is, it isn’t ours to claim for.
We think we are spending money, we are actually spending time. Apparently, time is spending us. We crave for money and authority, power and deceit. Time pumps out the energy out of us, we are spent every minute, every hour.
Good and bad. Optimism and criticism. Love and hate. Pride and loathe. Jealousy and withdrawal. Time is the boss, rest are pawns of the dangling needle.
If it isn’t happening, then it isn’t the right time. Wait, hold on, take a step back. The plunge is not to be taken yet.
If ‘Time’ is not ready, then we are not. All we do, is to wait for a better pedestal to shine.
Our goals, ambitions, desires, aspirations, dreams – all are equally fragile and reluctant. That’s the steel behind the making of our mettle.
Uncertainty, for real, is a gruesome and agonizing yet perpetual way of establishing the impossible in our lives. We will never accomplish if all is in paper and written for our destinies to galore. The fear of failing gets us to the brink of success, the fear of a fling apart gets us closer to our tethering victory in an ambushed amphitheater. It’s all performance at the the right time, in the right place, with the right people.
We have everything in us to take this world in our stride, get to place of persistence and courage. But we also have this horrendous knack of throwing it away for trivial reasons and see glory walk past us to the next corridor. We sulk in our inability to get past the difficult mile after sowing the seeds for months, perhaps years. That’s confidence. Our biggest ally in chaos.
Remember, your confidence is the key to the minds of people. It furnishes, assimilates, manipulates and drives every one crazy. Confidence is an attribute but am a great believer in instincts. Do what is right, losing sleep over the consequences will get us closer to insanity.
The pursuit to happiness doesn’t exist, it lives in your ability to find and maneuver excellence. Yes, you are only a genius of situations. Don’t ponder much in to the concept as such but keep the search on.
Remember, we are one of our kind. The human kind.