days, come back.

There are few moments in life when chaos and joy are seen together. I saw these moments in the past few days which tells me that we are indeed blessed in a way to be together with the people we love and do things together that gets us unrivalled in a blissful tale of relationships. 

Lights outside, lights inside our lives. Brightness has an inevitable bond with us, stitched with such eventful days.

I want them back, but decided to move forward with hopes of a reunion. Soon, again.

Mayavaram Paatti

For a very long time, I never realised the town had a different name. For me, it never mattered. It was her place of residence and that is all we knew during our growing up days. For us, it was enough. In fact, me and my sister never cared to know her name as well, for a very long time. Again, it doesn’t matter as names and relationships don’t always go hand in hand. Not for me, not for my sister either. She was our dear Granny, my mother’s mother and there lies the inherent respect that we derived and which deemed to exist forever.

We visited her and grandfather during our summer vacations, once in a couple of years. We lived far away but the connect was somewhere, ethereal to say the least. My grandfather was a reputed personality in the adjoining areas surrounding the town and widely respected. I and my sister used to be in awe of the palatial house they lived in and where my mother was born and raised. I am still in awe of that place, I don’t think we can afford to build a house like that in the city, even in today’s economical surge of possessions. The other day, I told my wife that the kitchen in the house used to be the size of our master bedroom, so it’s now easier for you to understand why we were so awe struck. She was the queen of the house and we all ran around like scattered pedestals from a garden of blooming flowers.

The house was perhaps the starting point for the current generation in our family that has grown up and is established in different parts of the world. Our cousins lived in different places and our visit was similar to a reunion – catch up, play pranks, have fun, irritate and disturb my grandfather’s afternoon siesta, and get the flak for it as well. But, nothing changed as our granny used to be at the back of us, supporting our trivial acts of childhood. All that and more, today belongs to the world of folklore.

I will never quote as being very close to her. Distance is one factor, second we did not belong to the classic generation where a spate of people lived under the same roof – grandparents, parents, cousins, relatives. But, the little moments spent with her during our early years will we etched as golden moments in our lives.

As we grow older, she grew old as well. Ironically, the sad part in the happiness of we growing up is the difficult episode of watching our parents growing old. Inevitable and excruciatingly believable, painful at the same time. She went through a similar phase, we lost our grandfather few years back which obviously was a big jolt in her life. From being the queen of independent living, I saw the transition that relegated her to the confines of four walls and very few people around her. Not that love diminished, it’s just that times were changing and she was part of the usual escapade.

With a life lived long enough to watch her children and grandchildren grow up and leading a fulfilling life, were indeed the high points of her illustrious life. Most significantly, her contribution is unsurpassable as we don’t exist if she doesn’t. A unhinged legacy.

Some people don’t leave us, they just distance themselves to keep vigil and see that we are safe. A mother is irreplaceable and her loss will be felt. As for her influence in our lives, time will make the statement at an apt hour of realisation (it does already!).

mayavaram-paatti

Paatti, please rest in peace and help us to remain blessed.

for my love, today!

There was a time when I loved being alone, with lots of friends, acquaintances and knowhows around. Today, I need my lifelines to survive. Gosh! Life turns around and suddenly, I am a despicable man.

prelude to a special day

Yes, no propaganda, no hustles, no despairing efforts to tell people it’s a day we await every year, no inane posts on FB as if it was the last day on this restrained earth and am the only one celebrating a special day of its kind. Yes, we all love moments in life, and we cherish to treasure them in gift boxes. Gifts of immortal jars that get vanquished by blessings of the eternal.

By the way, happy birthday to my sweetheart and soul of my glorious life.

rural sojourn

God’s invitation, hot and sweaty summer afternoon, swaying landscapes under the breathing sun, mobile lunch and lots of memories packed. Blazing bliss.

the day of resurgence

Not married, but I got hooked this day, 4 years ago. Completely, totally, exclusively. No looking back, just love and lots of love, and lots of it. Life started a journey of fulfillment with our union, and ever since, I just keep falling in love with you. Everyday, every time. We are growing together, understanding each other, the bond just gets better. Yes, we are ready to share the best and worst of each other. We realize, we are key to each other’s success. But, I emphatically disagree. You are my lucky charm. Period.

Love you. Do I need to say more?

perfection lives through ignorance

Perfection does not lead you to oblivion, it gets you closer to it. Doesn’t matter how long you practiced it, you will fall short as long as excellence chases you.

It isn’t naïve to believe am not perfect, no one is. When people say ‘I am Perfect’, it means the individual is good at something that you are not. He is better, probably much better, but isn’t God. You are good at something he almost doesn’t practice but you don’t tell him. You either don’t care or you can’t. You are mortal.

I say ‘am perfect’ 100 times in a day. The other person across doesn’t respond, not because he isn’t perfect but he fears that revealing the core definition of perfection might self-inflict a sense of animosity towards the integration of human behaviour. Saying ‘I am’ is much easier than saying ‘I am not’.

Nothing is perfect, at the sub conscious level. Work without policies, roads without rules, night without day, shade without trees, achievements without failures. All of these is something we all would like to happen but the tide is never on your side, so is the story here.

Perfection has no alibi. You can be near prefect, be the champion in what you do, encapsulate theories through the palm of your hand and be a master story teller. But, yet, still, no alibi. No persuasion. No stimulants.

Random genius, an act of isolated phenomena, an occurrence coming out from lady luck, camouflage, acts out of prejudice. None is perfection.

Being despicable isn’t an invited proposition, never with perfection. But can glide over, when required. Not inane, but certainly susceptible.

Yes. I agree. My days are far away, and reachable. 

‘Mother’ of all happiness

You do have many names – Mom, Amma, Ma. But all of them get equated to the same level of dignified poise that you continue to epitomise throughout our lives. We were born, we grew up, we told you we love you and we hate you, we still grew up, we finished school and college, got a job, got married.. the saga of plutonized evolution continued and still continues. But over the years, you have not changed. We have always taken you for granted but your sacrifices never went un-granted. Thank you isn’t the word you deserve because we can never thank you enough. Amma, we just don’t love you, we adore you. You are the powerhouse of our lives.

And, ironically, it will always be an icing on the cake for you – Happy Birthday Mom.

the pious piece

One of my most worshipped places. The goddess of ultimate victory, the sound of lashing waves through the holy Ganga, the colossal view of Bally, the shrine where the famous dialogue took place, perhaps a monologue of a saint is the brimming moment of truth.